I needed a reason to get up in the morning
other than to do things that were unnoticed
In the cool of the middle of last night
at 4:26am
I had a stare down with the Moon
and I'd like to think I won
But the only one who beats the Moon is the Sun
and I don't have enough of the smiles to get on that spectrum
so this will have to do
Maybe a headache is just the antidote
after all,
I fell out of love somewhere between last night and this morning
and somewhere above the people who didn't believe it to begin with
and then I was thinking,
it would have been better if I didn't go to sleep
and this would all be fine by me
because there are only two types of people---
those that believe in Moon River---
and those that don't
so utterly downbeat. I liked a lot of the imagery and the overall tone of your writing here, which felt casual and informal. However, I wasn't that into the last line. In fact, I believe that if you removed the last three lines from "because there are..." through "...that don't", this would be an even better piece. Lastly, let's see some damn positive prose! I'm tired of being dragged through the sullen muck!
ReplyDeleteI'm crossing you in a mile!!!!!! and yes please out of the muck would be great!
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